feeling under the weather.

It's so gloomy outside,
so do my feelings.

I find my mood lifts considerably when the weather is good and drops badly when the weather is gloomy.

sometimes i feel im out of control. i cant control what im doing. in the end of the day, im thinking what am i doing? why did i messed up my own life? im
still uncertain about what i really wanted from my life, my relationship which i am still unclear if its coming or going. how many times do i need to fail?
owh well, lifes about failing, standing up, accepting and move on, right?

i know its okie for me to feel this way because i am experiencing some changes in life. walking into a new phase of life aint easy especially when i was in that comfort zone for so long.
i am excited about the change, anxious about the change, and depressed about letting go my previous life.

i really hope my class to start soon, and get really busy with life, and somehow, i will settle with my new life. and hopefully, the anxiety and depression will taper off then.

i shall stop wasting my strength struggling against my feelings;
yuanteng, patient and wait.


p.s. pardon me for my berketul ketul English as i had stop blogging since ages. and not studying for 6 months? lol i shall get so books and read now.
yuanteng blogging throughout the rainy weather. and its still raining.